Kate Buckley and Matthias Jordan had known each other for 20 years before they ended up together. “It was a real surprise!” – but a welcome one – they say of the friends to partners pipeline. “This wasn’t the first rodeo for either of us, but we knew it was different.” 

The couple had only been together for eight months when they got engaged, but they certainly weren’t plagued by any commitment-phobia – in fact, they’d already bought a house together.

“We have both been all-in since our first week together really, and not afraid to hit some milestones,” says Kate. “Life is short!” It was on their first night in their new digs, surrounded by a sea of boxes, that Matthias got down on one knee to pop the question. It was an easy yes for Kate – despite not being very conservative people, they both felt strongly about making a traditional commitment. “It felt like a line in the sand and an important foundation.”

The vision

While the decision to get married came easily, the pair weren’t so sure about the wedding part – initially deciding they didn’t want one. But after thinking through the marriage logistics, the plan to elope emerged as the perfect choice.

They were already going to America on holiday, so they booked a legal signing before they left New Zealand. This involved a legal ceremony and paper signing at Basque Park in Eden Terrace, near their house, with a local celebrant and their two daughters Annie (16) and Poppy (20).

Next, they planned a relaxed elopement ceremony to add to the end of their US trip. “We only told our daughters and close family, and they were super supportive and happy for us,” she says. “We wanted it to be simple, fun and relaxed. The style was always going to be a bit vintage/rock n roll/alternative and the vibe was always going to be ‘relaxed elopement’, the exact opposite of ‘stressful wedding’.”

The outfits

To fit the relaxed, rock’n’roll vibe, the couple wore a mix of thrifted clothing and things they already had in their closet. Kate wore her own 1970s vintage dress, with boots from Molly Thrifted. Matthias wore his own jeans, belt and boots, and completed the look with a Wrangler western-style shirt from Vixen Vintage Boutique on Auckland's Karangahape Road. Wearing vintage was a natural fit, given Kate owns her own vintage store, Dead Man Vintage. It's also roof you don’t need to spend your yearly rent on looking good for the big day.

In fact, the entire wedding came to roughly $3000 – since they already had the American trip booked, this covered the New Zealand marriage licence and celebrant, American photographer, hair, vintage clothing, food, drinks and cake. 

When it came to hair and makeup, they kept things equally easy. Matthias did his own, while Kate popped into a local salon on the day. Fortunately their first client was a no show, so they squeezed Kate in for a blow out. The final touch were the rings – the couple went for a simple wedding band each, one silver and one gold. 

The ceremony

One of Kate’s closest and oldest friends Megan, and her partner Andrew, live in LA and have a mid-century A frame cabin up in Idyllwild, California. “We were lucky enough to stay and have the ceremony there,” says Kate. “Megan and I went to high school together in Nelson so we’ve been friends for almost 30 years!”

In a turn of luck and/or fate, Megan also has her licence to officiate weddings, so was able to marry the couple on the day. The script Megan wrote, as well as the vows Kate and Matthias penned, were kept secret until the day. “There were a few tears,” says Kate. “I guess as you get older you realise how important love, true friendship and these special moments really are.”

After the ceremony, Andrew fired up the grill to make everyone smash burgers, which was followed by a beautiful cake made by Proof Bakery in Atwater. They washed it all down with American beer and their favourite non-alcoholic drink – De La Calle Tepache, a Mexican fermented drink that comes in flavours like Mango Chili and Pineapple Spice.

The details

Before heading out to the cabin from LA, the couple went to Trader Joe's in Silverlake and grabbed several bunches of flowers. “Then I made up my own rather wild looking bouquet on the day,” says Kate. 

To soundtrack the occasion, they placed a speaker outside as they danced under the trees and had photos taken. “Matthias is a musician and we both love music so there’s always good music playing,” she says.

The photos in question were taken by Naomi Skye, a local Idyllwild photographer they found online before they left New Zealand. “We kept the brief pretty simple: capture the Idyllwild beauty and the magic of the special occasion, not too much posing, just keep it relaxed and fun.” 

Post-wedding thoughts

The elopement was everything the couple hoped it would be, but “we did miss our family and friends, so we may need to have a big party one day.”

Their advice for anyone planning their own big (or small) day? “Concentrate on what’s important to you both as a couple, and don’t worry about what other people think.”