Angela Meyer is a Gender Equity Specialist in the financial sector and is the co-founder of Hi Money.‍

Gen X icon Victoria Beckham celebrated her 50th birthday recently, gracefully defying the march of time with David by her side. Watching him piggyback her out of the party as her feet succumbed to the strains of dancing in heels all night, I couldn’t help reflecting on how young and carefree they looked. Money has a knack for preserving youth, sure, but the other thing I’m fairly certain Victoria wasn’t worrying about as she rubbed her feet later that night, was how the hell she’s going to afford retirement.

Like Victoria, I am only 15 years away from being eligible for the Gold Card and what keeps me awake at night is how I’m going to live once I’ve got one.

I am not alone. In New Zealand, a staggering 80% of women rate their financial wellbeing as low or very low. Canstar Pulse Survey showed that 77% of women said they were not on track or didn’t know if they were on track to achieve their retirement goal.  For Gen X women, this statistic hits even closer to home.

Why? Aren’t we all meant to be cashed up, confidently investing, and mortgage- free by now? Aren't we meant to be feeling good about money?

A quick poll on Instagram reveals a common thread of financial shame and embarrassment among the Gen Xers. 

Many in this cohort are still burdened by their student loan debt. I have a friend who will only complete her payments a few months shy of her 50th birthday and most of that was interest.  

Another friend didn't manage to pay off her student loans until she was 43. “I didn't pay it off until 43, when I got divorced, and all through the child rearing years I was paying 10% more tax than my hubby. For years, I could only keep up with paying off the interest, and only paid off the loan once interest was scrapped. It was a barrier to travelling and all sorts.”  

It took me 17 years, 10 months and 3 days to pay off mine. 

In New Zealand in the 90s, our relationship with money was profoundly shaped by the dawn of a new free-market economy, spearheaded by policies like Rogernomics and the Labour government's embrace of neoliberal economics. 

As Gen X women, we found ourselves at the forefront of this economic transformation, facing the stark reality of being the first cohort to pay for university and the guinea pigs of the hellscape of the student loan scheme. In our early lives we were thrust into a financial landscape devoid of resources like KiwiSaver schemes and paid parental leave. 

Gen X women were raised to do two things simultaneously: operate according to traditional gender roles and be independent, career-focus business ladies.

It was a lot. It is still a lot. As one friend put it, “We were raised to break glass ceilings, but no one handed us a financial roadmap.”

As Eve Fairbanks says in her essay about #metoo, the 90s were “a peculiar era caught between the confidence that there had been fabulous progress in relationships between the sexes and smouldering remnants of the past where bold women were feared and ridiculed.” 

Critics might dismiss our Gen X struggles as financial mismanagement or merely being clueless.  As one GenZer said to me recently, “Why didn’t you just start investing when you were young?” Why indeed?  

While we were taught ‘practical’ skills like making sausage plaits and pillowcases in manual education classes, and encouraged to embrace certain aspects of ‘empowerment’ such as going to strip clubs or treating relationships like competitive sports in our 20s, financial education was conspicuously absent from our upbringing. 

Even if we sought it out, accessing financial education was really hard. Investing in the stock market, for instance, required a minimum of $10,000 before you could even open an account. To use a 90s phrase: ‘F..k a duck.’ 

This is from the generation of women who were raised on the matra ‘Girls can do anything.’ Only the ‘anything’ didn’t include money.  

In the words of another 90s icon, Carrie Bradshaw: “I can’t help thinking’ what life would have been like if the women of Gen X had been served financial education as well as cosmopolitans and discount codes for vibrators.”

Sex and the City, a touchstone of many of us in our 20s, was the ultimate capitalist fantasy disguised as female empowerment. We watched as Carrie and her crew chased love and labels, but where was the episode on economic independence? 

So many of us had no clue, and have spent our 40s trying to make up for lost ground. Some of us have caught up, kind of. And feel both grateful and ashamed that we didn't get our shit together sooner. 

Whatever your personal circumstances, the statistics are eye-watering. In 2024, there is a 36% gender gap in retirement savings – an increase of 16% in two years.  

The gender pay gap has barely moved in years. New research by the Financial Services Council found that two-third of female respondents had personal income of less than $50,000, only 6% of female respondents earn above $100,000 compared with 15% of male respondents. 

Sixty per cent of female respondents said they worked part-time, casually or were not currently working compared to 40% of their male counterparts. Plus a cost of living crisis and government slashing services. 

And of course, every personal financial situation depends on a number of factors and you can’t budget your way out of poverty. 

This shit is big and it has a profound impact on our ability to experience financial freedom.

Anne Summers, an OG Australian feminist and journalist, recently outlined her four principles for women’s equality and number one was Financial Self Sufficiency. Yep. Number one. 

If we want to address the financial wellbeing of an entire generation, then addressing the gender gap of financial wellbeing is of paramount importance.

While in the last five years the financial industry has started to wise up to the vast economic potential of women by providing financial tools and resources in an attempt to reduce the economic gender gaps, they haven’t been able to crack the heart piece. 

Research shows that personal finance is 20% head knowledge and 80% behaviour and mindset. How we think and feel about money – our relationship with money – is one of the biggest determinants of our ability to build wealth. Money is not just about maths; it’s about beliefs, ideas, and emotions.

Women need some support to unpack the complicated emotions they have about money.

First up, it’s not too late. We have all done harder things – like surviving the contradictory nature of 90s female empowerment, wearing petticoats over pants and getting lower back tattoos. 

As Gen X stands on the cusp of our ‘hot decade’ (a term used in the financial industry for people 55-/65 years old, because they suddenly become interested in their retirement savings ), we can start by reframing our relationship with money. 

The work I do with therapist, Rachel Davies, at Hi Money starts with our emotions. We began doing this work on ourselves, reframing our negative beliefs, stories and habits about money, using therapeutic techniques and applying feminist financial principles. We found that once we examined our money psychology, we instantly became more confident, cashed up and in-control of our financial lives.

We felt like we suddenly ‘understood’ money. It was a game changer. I was finally able to save enough to buy a house, start investing, and completely transform my financial situation. Yes, time is the best thing we’ve got when it comes to investing, but this money stuff is not that hard- the basics of financial advice could fit on a tea towel.

Our experience is that the systemic stuff is hard, long game work. But, women can’t wait for legislation – we need something now. 

Starting with getting conscious about how we really feel about money and transforming our money psychology can be a very fruitful and relatively easy/simple step toward gaining more economic security. A 10 minute exploration of our money mindset could garner hundreds of thousands of increased retirement income. Little changes now can make an exponential difference in the long term.

Like Victoria Beckham and the Spice Girls, who performed at her 50th, our friends are our career and money superpower. Many of us are now in positions to influence the change we want to see.  We can start by cutting ourselves a bit of slack, taking a deep breath and getting clear about our relationship with money.