The Ensemble Love Line is here to help.

We put the call out for your love, dating, sex and relationship conundrums, and we had an array of people call and message in (thank you to those who opened up!). We took those anonymous questions and concerns and put them to a range of relevant ‘experts’ - this week we're asking: When are exes off limits?

If you have a dilemma that you’d love our panel to ponder, get in touch with the Ensemble Love Line on 0272095569.

I recently broke up with a guy I was seeing for three years. My friend decided that it was no issue to date him. In any usual circumstances this would be a total no go, but in high school I dated her ex boyfriend a few months after they broke up. It caused a rift between us, but this has since healed.

Should I suck it up, as karmic retribution for my high school self? Or should she know better, having been through the same experience when we were in high school?

Advice from Abbie Chatfield, host of FBOY Island Australia, streaming on Hayu 

I feel like a high school boyfriend isn't a real boyfriend. I feel like if you've been with someone for three years, your friends should definitely not date them, particularly if it was a recent breakup. So I think... that's not a real friend. Cut her off!

Abbie Chatfield is a presenter and content creator, and host of FBOY Australia

Advice from  Stacey O, sex, love and relationship coach, and host of the podcast 'Finger Food'

Firstly, I’m so sorry about your breakup and that your friend has now started dating him. Three years is a significant amount of time, and the grief is hard enough without the added complication of friend betrayal.

Secondly, I've been on both sides of this situation, so I can wholeheartedly relate. I got together with my ex-husband, who was a friend's recent ex, which was complicated. Later, a friend started dating my ex a week after we ended things, which was incredibly painful and I also labeled it as karma for my past actions. I thought I would never do it again because the pain I felt was so strong being on the receiving end of it, but another man sought me out who had dated my friend, and I felt a real pull toward him, finding myself back in the friend-ex paradigm once again…

Having experienced both sides, I have compassion for each, and I’ve learned a lot about what's worked (and what really hasn’t) when going through something as icky as this. I like to think of myself as a trustworthy friend, a woman's woman, someone with a feminist core that values sisterhood above a man any day. And while that's still true, there is also a vulnerable part of me that wants to be chosen, loved, and to experience deep intimacy with a romantic partner. And as you can tell from some of these experiences above, sometimes that side has taken over and overridden my more socially admirable principles.

My advice here is that there is no one-size-fits-all answer and that every situation is nuanced and unique to the people involved.

Here are some musings to hopefully help you find some clarity:

• How do you truly feel about your friend dating your ex? Is it the principle that bothers you, or do you still have feelings for him? What’s behind that? And what are you making it mean about yourself?

• Have you talked to your friend about it? Having a proper conversation with your friend to express how it’s made you feel as well as listening to her reasons for dating him might dissipate some of the tension.

• Evaluate the friendship. How much do you value it, and is this a deal-breaker?

• Set boundaries moving forward. Whether you accept it or not, make it clear what your limits are to prevent future conflicts.

Ultimately, trust your gut. Your intuition will guide you toward the right decision for you. It’s much easier said than done, but forgiveness and letting go might bring more peace than holding onto the pain and betrayal. As hard as it is, sometimes, letting love blossom can be worth more than holding onto past hurts.

As a Certified Sex, Love, and Relationship Coach and Culinary Artist, Stacey O seamlessly combines her passions in her global independent podcast 'Finger Food'. Through cooking her guests' favourite dishes, they engage in vulnerable conversations around intimacy and relationships over a shared meal. Specialising in somatic coaching, Stacey explores the intricate connection between the mind and body, guiding clients towards deeper self-understanding and expression. She's dedicated to normalising open discussions about sex and pleasure worldwide, empowering people to discover more freedom within themselves.

Advice from Abby Howells, comedian and director of Did Titanic Sink Season 2‍

As someone who is a fan of both revenge and symmetricity, there is something compelling about the karmic balance this act has set off. But the thing is, it’s not quite equal, at least not to me. The scales are off. A high school relationship is different from a three year adult relationship.

I don’t think you need to suck it up, or suck anything up, if it’s not your preferred method of getting stuff into your mouth. This was a bad move on the part of your friend. For me, a stranger who has no stakes in this situation or any more context than this one paragraph, I didn’t like it and I’ll back you 100% until the day I die. Was she laying in wait for you to break up in order to enact this retribution? This whole situation stinks!

I think this at least warrants a ‘what gives?’ conversation and if your friend isn’t receptive to listening to your feelings (which are very valid btw!!) then it might be time to cut her loose.